Well that didn't go to fucking plan...

So, there I am, pulling faces in the cattle shed when the female servant came in and dragged, yes dragged me and that fat tub of lard, Jeitoso out of the shed. She shoved him in the field and took me down to the garden. THEN SHE PUT ME IN THE FUCKING PIG PEN!!! WITH PIGS!!! What the FUCK was she thinking? So I trashed it and jumped out. Anyway... long story short, I ended up in the main field with four posh twats  lusitanos, one of whom was Jeitoso. Of course, he was giving it large, making out that he was hard, by chasing me around the field. Of course, he couldn't catch me because I'm the right weight and svelt and he's a fat fucker bit overweight.

So, after an afternoon of stuffing my face on grass, the female servant came and caught me. I thought it was for something nice, because she had apples, but no, the BITCH had an ulterior plan. A FUCKING BATH!! She gave me a bath!! What made it worse, was that her "friend" was with her, helping. The "friend" refered to me as a bit like a large dog. What the FUCK is with these people? First I'm sent to a fucking DOG rescue, then I'm refered to as a large dog. HELLLOO people!!! I'm a PONY. Spelt P.O.N.Y. I am NOT a fucking dog! Anyway, this "friend", lets call her "retard" knows nothing about horses. Nothing. She couldn't even tie me up. Instead she stood there on the end of my lead rope in a dress and leather cowboy boots and tried to give me a fucking bath with a yellow hosepipe. She then said I looked like her DOG! Fucking hell. I'm calling the RSPCA.