Bloody cat...

So, this morning I'm in bed. You know the senario, deep in fresh straw, snoozing away dreaming of apples and hunky black shetland stalions, when I was startled out of my slumber by the human opening the shed door. Fantabulous thinks I.. breakfast is en-route followed by a couple of hours grazing in the field in the morning sunshine. How can a Sunday morning get any better, thinks I?

But NO. The human has come into the shed to feed a fucking CAT. I've seen the black furry thing around the sheds the last couple of days, but Jeitoso posh twat had told me that it was just a random stray cat and so I ignored it. What a fucking lying posh twat bastard that horse is. Apparently, the black fuzz ball I've been seeing is Sid the shedcat and it's his shed and the servants humans I've been issued with are stupid enough to do all his bidding. He gets fed twice a day, AND so the posh twat Jeitoso tells me, Sid gets fed down at the house on demand too!! Apparently there are 9 cats on this farm and the whole farm revolves around THEM. To add insult to injury, she didn't even bring me so much as a fucking carrot - she just left us with manky hay! BITCH. 

So, apparently I have 2 options. Call the RSPCA and complain about the service, or become a cat. Still, I suppose being a cat is better than being called a fucking dog!